Planning a Bar/Bat Mitzvah in Jerusalem
Celebrating a bar/bat mitzvah in Jerusalem is a magical experience both for the bar/bat mitzvah boy or girl, the family and all the guests who come out of town. The feeling of having the ceremony at the Western Wall, surrounded by the holy city is inimitable.
Of course, that’s the fun part. There’s also the hard part — planning.
However satisfying the outcome, the planning stages are fraught with challenges, hoops and hurdles, so it’s important to understand what you need to do for a successful celebration… and whether you want to take on the challenge yourself or hire a professional event planner to do the dirty work.
We’ve invited a handful of Israeli event planners to share their thoughts on the most important things to think about before having a bar/bat mitzvah in Jerusalem or anywhere in Israel, and they have some great tidbits.
If you have a specific issue you’re wondering about use our handy dandy table of contents to navigate there directly:
- Choosing a venue
- Ceremony at the Kotel (Western Wall)
- Planning for different denominations of Judaism
- Alternatives to the Kotel
- Accommodation for family and guests
- Saving money through VAT refunds and exemptions
- Photography & video
- Tours
- Buying tefillin
Choosing a venue
Photo: Tal Dafna
Nothing can make or break an event like the venue, whether you’re talking about the ceremony or the reception. Jerusalem is so full of stunning venues that it can actually be hard to choose. Revital Azulay of Revital Events says that while the venue itself is certainly important, your personality, your child, guests and what kind of event you want to have is an equal deciding factor.
“When starting to plan a bar/bat Mitzvah in Jerusalem you have to choose the right location, a place with a unique theme depending on the bar/bat Mitzvah child’s interests,” she says. “You also must take into account the season when the event will take place to decide whether it will be indoors or outdoors. I usually recommend to plan an event in Israel between the months of March and October. Since you almost never have to worry about rain during this time, you can confidently celebrate outdoors and enjoy the view of the Old City of Jerusalem.
“In addition, it is very important to choose a location that is unique and has a special value to it — for example an ancient synagogue with lots history to it, an art gallery with a landscape of Jerusalem or a restaurant located in a unique area, such as Mishkenot Sha’ananim.
“And when it comes to food, don’t mess around. Always choose a restaurant with a professional chef to enjoy a real culinary experience in Jerusalem!”
Check out our full listing of restaurants for bar/bat mitzvahs >>
Click here to find a bar/bat mitzvah venue
Ceremony at the Kotel (Western Wall)
“Celebrating their son’s bar mitzvah at the Kotel is a dream come true for many parents,” says Tanya Hakimian of Amazing Simchas. “The question is where do you start planning for an event such as this.
“Firstly, make sure you have set a budget to help you focus on the important aspects of the day. Sit down and write a list of things you want on this special day and keep it with you at all times so that you can keep track of what you are spending. Secondly, the weather is a factor I would definitely take into account. In the summer it is really hot and in the winter it can get really cold, so come prepared. Third, make sure that everything is organized well in advance so that you don’t get stressed out on the day.
“Although Jerusalem is a beautiful city, it comes with challenges. You will find that parking is a nightmare and it is best to organize busses for your guests. You should also take little children, older members of your family and friends and disabled people into consideration when deciding how to get to the kotel. There is quite a bit of walking to be done and not all your guests will be up for the challenge. We always do our best to come up with creative solutions to these issues.”
Planning for different denominations of Judaism
People from all walks of Jewish life come to Jerusalem to celebrate their bar/bat mitzvah’s because “Jerusalem holds religious significance to Jewish people regardless of their level of observance,” says Adena Mark of A to Z Events Israel. However, your level of observance will certainly have an impact on what type of celebration you want to have and what venues are available to you.
For instance, “if the family does not want separation of men and women or wants to have the bat mitzvah girl read from the torah, then the Kotel is not for them, but this doesn’t have to be a challenge,” she adds.
“There is something for everyone in Jerusalem, and it’s simply a matter of knowing what is available and choosing the right location. Having the ceremony elsewhere can allow the family to celebrate according to their customs and observance, and yet still have the emotional and spiritual significance of Jerusalem.”
Alternatives to the Kotel
For families that either can’t or don’t want to celebrate at the Kotel, Adena is a big fan of the Davidson Center because of it’s stunning grounds, accommodations for progressive services, historical significance and proximity to the Kotel. And if you can’t take advantage of the spirituality that the Kotel adds to a ceremony, she suggests choosing a location with a view of the Kotel and/or a theme that adds significance.
If you plan on having an Orthodox ceremony and are looking for another historically significant venue, check out the 4 Sephardic Synagogues.
“Very often, the families ask me to assist them to find a theme for the party relating to a significant cause or activity to which the family relates,” she says. ” Some examples of what we have done with clients include a volunteer project or donation to organizations in Israel – care packages to IDF soldiers, donation of musical instruments or sports equipment to a school or organization, food packages to the needy, a donation to a playground or park, or clothing donations to an orphanage, to name a few.
Revital suggests also suggests a number of alternative locations around the city, such as:
- Touro Restaurant in Mishkenot Sha’ananim with a stunning view of the Old City walls
- Hotel Yehuda in South Jerusalem
- David’s Harp Gallery in the Old City
All of which have areas that can be transformed into synagogues with stunning views.
In addition, Yad Vashem can be particularly moving and significant.
View from Touro Restaurant
If you’re not married to the idea of Jerusalem, think about some of these alternative locations around the country:
- Desert — Start off morning prayers at an ancient synagogue in Masada then hike Masada, followed by a dinner party by the Dead Sea as we set it up with tables, chairs, lighting and an orchestra.
- Seaside — Start the day in Old Jaffa and celebrate the festival in the evening in Caesarea by the water with lighting, an orchestra and gourmet food.
- True Kindness — Celebrate in a school for disabled children or children coming from difficult homes who wouldn’t necessarily celebrate a party of their own.
Accommodation for Family and Guests
Finding accommodation for a bar/bat mitzvah means not only finding it for your family, but often also for your guests, so it typically pays to go with a hotel that is used to hosting large groups. Whether or not you want to use the hotel’s facilities for the event should also play a role in your decision.
Most of the big hotels in Jerusalem can accommodate bar/bat mitzvah groups and celebrations, which is great for big events. But if you are looking for something more intimate and personalized try Hotel Yehuda or Mount Zion Hotel near the Old City.
Saving Money — Value Added Tax
When planning an event overseas, cost concerns can always creep into the picture. Luckily, Liza Even-Israel of Events by Liza has some great advice on how to save money by either avoiding Israel’s value added tax or getting a tax refund on certain purchases.
“Many tourists are unaware of the various opportunities for VAT free or Vat reimbursements available when planning their events,” Liza says. “Being that VAT in Israel is at 17% , this can account for big savings.
“First of all, it is important to know that if you are staying at a hotel and holding your event at the same hotel, you will not pay VAT for any of your non-Israeli guests staying at the hotel. Furthermore, if you are purchasing certain goods for your event in Israel and you are not an Israeli citizen, you will also be entitled to a VAT refund at the airport. For example, I coordinated a wedding for a couple coming from the States. They wanted an Israeli made Ketubah from a certain artist. The artist supplied them with a special VAT refund receipt which they presented to the authorities at the airport and were reimbursed for the VAT.”
Photography & Video
If you’re going through all the trouble of having all this celebration, then you’re definitely going to want to capture those beautiful memories with photos that do them justice. Unfortunately, history is littered with amazing events with disappointing photos, so it’s important to think long and hard about your photographer. Barak Aharon of Barak Photography is an Israeli photographer who is well-known on the events scene and has also had his photos published in numerous newspapers. He has some advice:
Finding the right photographer
“Naturally, not every bar or bat mitzvah is the same; locations, guests, and circumstances vary widely,” Barak says. “However, if you have looked at the photographer’s portfolio, and the pictures seem like the kind of thing you would be happy to see on your wall at home, then that’s a match.
“Also, keep in mind that your photographer is going to be present on an important and intimate day in your life – feel free to give your photographer a call in order to get to know the person who will be documenting
the big day. Equally important is to take a look at what others have said about working with your potential photographer (Is s/he prompt and prepared? Was the work delivered on time? What was it like to effectively invite this person into a family event?); a transparent business will provide reviews through a third party service like Google Plus, TrustPilot, or others.”
The challenges
“For people coming from abroad, the process of planning an event in another country can be stressful,” he adds. “However, there are plenty of virtual resources available to potential clients (no matter where they are from).
“The website is your first stop. After all, it’s a window into the business, and any photographer worth his or her salt knows that this can be a deal-maker or breaker. Make sure there is an English version of the website; if not, that’s a non-starter.
“Pay attention to the speed and detail in which you receive a response to your inquiry. And finally, invest in a conversation to get a general vibe and verify what type of experience the photographer has working with b’nei mitzvah families (ask about the flow of a typical event, and don’t be shy to ask for suggestions about local, the party, or even accommodation based on past examples).
Tours
While celebrating a bar/bat mitzvah in Jerusalem is an incredibly rewarding experience in and of itself, guided tours of Jerusalem and the rest of Israel can also be an enriching accompaniment.
In addition to being fun and educational, it has the potential “to plant the seeds of personal development, self grown and responsibility in a young teenager,” says Jerusalem-based tour guide David Sussman, adding that for such an occasion, you should be sure to hire a “highly qualified guide.”
“Definitely look for a native English-speaking guide. This ensures you will understand everything he or she is saying, and that he understands the subtleties of your culture.
“The guide should be passionate, funny and engaging for both the kids as well as the adults, and if they served in the army here, that is always a plus as well, as army service is a huge part of Israeli society and will give your guide a true sense of Israeli culture.
If you use an event planner, in most cases s/he will be more than happy to arrange tours for you However, if you’d like to find your own tours, check out our listing of tours in Jerusalem in Israel.
Buying Tefillin
One of the most important and meaningful aspects of any bar mitzvah (and for some bat mitzvahs) is the donning of tefillin. Jerusalem is home to Oter Israel, one of the most highly regarded producers in the world of tefillin in accordance with all types of Jewish tradition.
In addition to selling tefillin, Oter Israel also offers tours of its factory, where you can get an up-close look at the process of making tefillin, from inscription to assembly. Learning about all the effort and care that goes into producing tefillin is sure to enhance the experience of putting on tefillin as a Jewish adult for the first time.
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